remembering our angels

i almost choked on my brother's Facebook shoutout. it reads:

"God Has made your journey into this world so short.You almost came fully existent but then you left too soon.Though your mother's womb didn't hold you much longer,we hold you forever in our hearts.Farewell Lil one..Have a safe journey back home,...to the hands of your CREATOR."

memories of my three miscarriages came back when i read this. like my brother and his wife, my heart ached when i remembered those times when I & hubby realized we could never hold those unborn babies in our lifetime. the pains came back. but now i am reconciled to the fact that even if we could never have them, but we always hold them close in our hearts.

those four years

four years ago today, hubby & I were both excited and nervous at the prospect of becoming Dad & Mom to our son. while we were expecting his birth, my mind can't focused - i didnt know what to do (even at my rather advance age) and what to expect. gosh, i can imagine if i was the one actually giving birth. though i was a bit afraid, but i remember the glorious experience of anticipation. my son's birth date falls on the Feast of Transfiguration. and i took it as God's way of allowing me to experience some sort of transfiguration - if i may compare it to that.

like all mothers, raising up my son is both a happy and bumpy ride. but each day of being with him brings myriad of experiences & lessons for me that i can't trade for anything. and i look forward to the years ahead - his teen age years, puberty, adulthood...

today, i reaffim myself that it was God's design that our son becomes a part of us. and i thank God for allowing me to experience the miracle of adoption.

Happy birthday Gab. remember, Dad and Mom love you very much.